I do not know much about what it means to be on the road to recovery from substance abuse other than my own, often bitter, sad or jaded feelings on the subject. I have watched what it can do to someone, I have seen how it can push at families to the point of breaking and I have seen what it means when someone doesn't reach the end of that road on this side of Heaven. What I have come to realize though is that we are all, in some sense, on a recovery road of our own. We are all broken and we all fall and we all stumble. We all go down that road in some fashion; battered hand over battered foot, pulling ourselves up rocks that seem too immense to climb. And that is just speaking of my own everyday struggle. I have never known what it means to fight an uphill battle with the weight of substance abuse trying to pull me back down. I saw my brother take that road time and again. For many years it was mostly at the prompting of those who loved him. And in the end it was his own wish, his own drive that kept him clean for over a year. I know what that hope feels like, I know because I felt it myself. I have heard the words that a father uses when he shares his story and the pride he has in his son as he hands him his year medallion. I have watched that same father break just months after, break into a million pieces that will never fully heal on this earth, as he comes to the realization that the redemption story didn't end the way he hoped it would. And I have watched, most often in awe and envy, at the way he chose to carry on. It did break him, the fact the story wouldn't be redeemed the way he had hoped, with his son here on Earth. But he also realized that it didn't mean the redemption ended, it didn't mean that the story was over. Sometimes the redemption story is given to the broken left behind. God entrusts those of us that know what its like and have seen what substance abuse can do, to reach out to those struggling and share the story of a life that can still go on. It goes on through the loved ones still here. It goes on through my brothers daughter and through my dad and through those who won't give up sharing his story and trying to reach people who need help.
They are just men; your common everyday dads, sons, friends, brothers and husbands. They wear no visible capes. But to me they are warriors, warriors on surf boards. Men who took a passion and are using it to share the story of a lost son, of a friend, so that hopefully another family won't have to know what it is like to continue on with just the story. So that hopefully the redemption can be seen through the beauty of a life lived out, clean and fully and free. My hope now is that this message and these videos will reach you where you need them most.
Maybe like me you are a sister struggling to understand what it means to be the sibling of an addict.
Maybe like my parents you are at war about the best way to help your child, to keep them and the rest of your family from going under.
Or maybe you are the child, the spouse, the parent, the friend, the one struggling to figure out how to keep your own head above water.
My hope is that you find a "board" or whatever it may be that drives you and that you let it take you as far away from drugs (in whatever form that may be) as it can.
My hope is that if you need help you reach out; to those who love you, to those who want to help or even to someone who you know is simply willing to lend a listening ear.
It matters. Your life matters. The things you leave behind matter. Your story matters.
Well said. Well said, indeed.
ReplyDeleteAppreciated this. Similar story here with my brother. Blessings to you.
ReplyDeleteI am glad it reached you and my thoughts are with you. It's never something you wish for anyone, but I am thankful for a community of support and being able to have someone who understands. Blessings to you as well!
DeleteOh Mel, I'm so sorry for this loss your family has felt. What a beautiful tribute from your Father for others that struggle also. I'm overwhelmed at the strength it must have taken to share this - through grief - to help others. God bless your family, friend!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Shan. Your encouragement really means so much! I am so very proud of my dad and the work he continues to do to help those in the recovery community. It was definitely not an easy thing to share, but I sincerely hope that sharing it can help someone else down the line.
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